Friday, September 16, 2011

Free falling

You know that moment right before you fall asleep? When your body is relaxed and your eyes are closed, but you're still aware?

I was lying down, trying to block out my fears for awhile. I had my TV turned on to a music channel that plays soft, relaxing music mixed with sounds of nature. As I try to drift off to sleep, I see myself falling out of a comfortable nest. I continue to fall gracefully, occasionally looking down to see if the end of my fall is near. It isn't. All I see is darkness. I look around me and everything is blurred. I'm falling quickly and it's exhilarating at first, but after awhile, all I want is to float back up to the nest where I felt safe and loved.

Today I am one step closer to growing up. That's how life works. You spend all your time wanting to be free. When you finally fall out of the comfort of your nest, the world around you blurs and it's too late to stop and take it all in. You keep falling, never knowing if you'll land safely or hit rock bottom.

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