I recently finished watching You've Got Mail for the first time, and there were a couple of lines in it that stood out to me and inspired me to write this post. I want to take a moment to share them with you. (In case you haven't seen the movie, Kathleen and Joe are the main characters.)
Kathleen: People are always telling you that change is a good thing. But all they're really saying is that something you didn't want to happen at all...has happened.
Joe: It wasn't personal.
Kathleen: What is that supposed to mean? I am so sick of that. All that means is that it wasn't personal to you. But it was personal to me. It's personal to a lot of people. And what's so wrong with being personal anyway?
I just admired how open and blunt Kathleen's character was. She didn't really pay a whole lot of attention to "rules" and commonly tossed around words of wisdom like, "Change is good" and "Don't take it personally."
She was heartbroken by said change, and she simply did take it personally...Regardless of whether or not that was how she was "supposed" to feel.
So that got me thinking...
Maybe it's okay to be hurt and angry because of something someone else said/did instead of forcing yourself to "let it go" or figure out the role you played in the situation. Maybe you can just simply give yourself permission to be upset when someone else says or does something that you know is wrong.
Maybe it's okay to lead what society would call an "average life" instead of constantly striving for greatness and figuring out a way to leave some sort of epic mark on the world. Maybe you can just simply wake up, tell your loved ones good morning, eat a bowl of cheerios, and go to work and let all of that be meaningful enough.
Maybe it's okay to be terrified and resist change and grieve loss instead of doing something proactive or busting through your negative feelings. Maybe you can just stay in bed all day, cry, or have a mini anxiety attack if that's what you feel you need to do.
Maybe it's okay to change your mind about a goal instead of feeling like you owe it to yourself to follow through no matter what. Maybe you can just choose another path and still be happy and fulfilled.
Maybe it's okay to sit at home all day and watch TV or play on the Internet instead of going out and making new friends every day. Maybe being your own best friend and having a comfortable handful of loyal friends who won't forget about you two days later is more than enough.
Maybe it's okay to keep personal matters to yourself instead of feeling obligated to share everything or answer people's questions when they ask things like, "Are you dating anyone?" or "How much money do you make?" or "What's your bra size?" Maybe you can just say, "I'd prefer not to discuss that," and not give two shits if your unwillingness to discuss it offends the person who asked the question.
Maybe it's okay to call yourself a writer, cook, musician, grown-up, whatever even if you're not widely considered to be a "real one." Maybe you can just write, cook, play music, or have responsibilities and allow that to be a perfect reason to call yourself a writer, cook, musician or grown-up.
Maybe it's okay to do something even if your family or friends disapprove. Maybe putting your own happiness first is more important in the end. (Spoiler alert: It is.)
Maybe it's okay to consume fast food, heavy pasta, dairy products, soda, meat, cookies, chocolate cake and caffeine. Maybe making a green smoothie every morning or reading blog post after blog post about why your eating habits suck isn't your cup of tea.
Maybe it's okay to roll your eyes at widely distributed bits of wisdom that don't serve you and help you feel like the awesome human being that you are. Maybe you can just say, do and feel whatever you want.